Repentance Begets Peace and Bliss; Repentance Begets Serenity and Clarity (Issue 281)

These past two days as I was bowing the Emperor Liang’s Jeweled Repentance, someone suddenly came to my mind; that person was Dharma Master Heng Wei. She passed away at age 95. The other day I was telling everyone that our karmic forces is very heavy and very deep. Why did I think of her? It’s because she had lived a life of bitter suffering. She was widowed at age 25. She fled from war-torn mainland China. She told me that she had a daughter and a son. But being widowed at a very young age she was not able to raise two kids, therefore she gave away her daughter. She lived with her son, sharing the space of a single bed. In the winter she used sheets of old newspaper as a blanket to keep warm. Sweet potato and salt as food, was considered a great meal.

Later on, she encountered Venerable Master’s way place when she was in her late thirties or early forties. She was so hoping to leave home. After living in the way place for two to three years, she wanted to leave home. The Venerable Master said, “No, you cannot leave home now. Your karmic obstructions are too heavy.” So, she waited and kept doing volunteer work at the temple. Every time she asked the Venerable Master for permission to leave home, she would get the same answer, “No. Your karmic obstructions are too heavy.” She waited until she was in her seventies and once more asked for permission to leave home. This time the Venerable Master said, “Yes, you may.” She was already in her seventies. This entire time she worked diligently and earnestly with all her strength for the temple. It took her about thirty or forty years to eliminate her karmic obstructions to be able to leave home. She personally told me this story. She knew deep down it was time for her to leave home. She lived until age 95.

Why did I think of her? When she passed away, I was at Gold Wheel Monastery, probably bowing the Emperor Liang’s Jeweled Repentance. I don’t remember exactly. I was ill at that time with a high fever. Later that evening I heard that Dharma Master Heng Wei had passed away, I was contemplating about going back to Hong Kong for her funeral. I asked a lay person, “What do you think? Should I go or not?” That lay person answered, “From my viewpoint as a lay person, it would be best if dharma master could make it back.” Then and there, I decided to head back the next day. I went with Dharma Master Shr to Hong Kong to arrange for her funeral.

Dharma Master Heng Yi was our senior dharma brother. She passed away in 2004. Without any prior arrangements or special requests with the funeral home in Hong Kong at that time, she was given the largest ceremonial hall at the mortuary. Later on, I found out that Dharma Master Heng Wei had this random thought at that time — “It would be good if my funeral service could be held at this particular ceremonial hall.” Surprisingly, when Dharma Master Wei passed away, she had that same ceremonial hall for her funeral service. Her daughter-in-law came from China to attend the services. She originally planned to stay just one night and to return to China immediately after paying her respects. After the entire ceremony was over, she told a lay person in Hong Kong that after seeing such an adorned dharma assembly and the dharma masters’ wholeheartedness in the ritual, she dared not leave halfway through and stayed for the entire ceremony. Hence, a person’s thought is really very important.

Some of the senior disciples in Hong Kong, both laity and monastics, are very supportive and very devoted to the way place. They have the way place in their minds at all times. When Dharma Master Heng Wei was a young lay person and living a hard life, the way place offered to give her money. However, she kindly declined, saying, “If I wanted money, I would go find work to earn money. I do not want any monetary reimbursement for my volunteer work at the way place.” Many of the senior disciples, whether laity or monastics, share the same sentiment.